Rational Insanity
By Bryan Mari Argos

The delicate matter of teenage sexuality

Allow me to be your unofficial psychologist for a while.

About a week ago, I was hungry after a gimmick night so I went to this 24-hour fast food resto popular among the young crowd in the city. At first everything was all right. While I was waiting for my food to be served, a plush Ford pick-up pulled over, loaded with young boys from about 17-20; when the doors of the car opened, about four or five middle-aged men came out escorting the young boys into the joint. When they all had their orders filed, they seated themselves. The boys were unusually quiet, and the older men who looked liked their uncles, began to talk.

“So, what would you like?” One of them said, referring to one of the kids who seemed to be more speechless than the others.

“I don't know…” Answered the kid.

I was discreetly listening to them when I realized that the uncles were asking the kids what kind of girl they would like for the evening as they could easily go out of the fast food after they had eaten and pick some girls up in the red light district of the city. Another thing I noticed was the insistence of the uncles in pushing the kids to have a girl in mind when they were done with their snack. It suddenly occurred to me that this must be one of those “baptism by sex” incidents that I have been reading about in many culture articles referring to the bravado and masculinity of the Filipino man. For those of you who have not heard about this, it goes this way: The older men in the family pick out an age when the young boys in the family are supposed to be de-virginized, and the older monsters take the kids out on a drinking night and finally have them rent out a prostitute under their supervision, and of course, have their first sex with the whore while the bellied (uncles) pimps brag about how manly their nephews/kids have become! What a sick practice! Going back to the kids I saw, I noticed that some of them were very obviously hesitant – meaning, some of them either did not want to have their first sex in that way, or some of them were not turned on by women, but could not refuse for fear of being an embarrassment to their titos; read: some of them were either gay or bisexual. It's not really that I am for these kids who have developed an alternative sexual preference, but at least, I am sensitive to a growing boys sexuality. This Filipino practice of “forced de-virgination” is an insult to responsible parenthood!

Sociologists have concluded that most suicide attempts among Filipino men are anomic. In other words, these are due to the fact that Filipino men are inherently conscious that as men they should be manly, filled with bravado, should not cry, or should not seek the help of others when frustrated. This stereotype results in men resorting to suicide to solve even the simplest of problems and remedy the most trivial of frustrations. This proves my theory that men in the Philippines are either homophobic or forcefully repress their or their male children's feminine side. This is very disheartening news for me, because I am fully in touch with my feminine side and I find it quite comforting at times.

Why can't we just allow the kids to discover their sexuality on their own rather than impose on them a norm that we believe would be socially acceptable? If your child is gay and you force him or her to have sex with someone of the opposite sex during the so-called “baptism by sex” you will achieve nothing more than give the kid a very traumatic experience. YOU CANNOT REVERSE THE KIDS' GAYNESS IN THIS WAY! Permissiveness is really not the issue here because permissiveness is sometimes synonymous with the local term “kunsintidora”. I am not asking parents and family members to be permissive with their children, if that's the case, I am only asking you guys to accept what is already there and be thankful for it. Do not put your kids through traumatic experiences that may not just damage their sexuality but also affect their decision making skills later on.

Uncles, fathers, and family members who insist on the sexual rite of passage for their male children are no better than barbarians; they are monsters of the lowest degree. Live with your bravado you old pimps but do not destroy the lives of your young ones by making them slaves to your disgusting practices! Katigulang nyo na! Mahuya man kamo! Kun ginakatlan kamo ya, kaluta nyo, indi pag-ipasa sa mga bata!

Be rational; be insane… every once in a while!

Hello to Anne and to Mary Dale! Hello to my dearest readers, Chan, Mr. Bobot, Vic, Vincent, and Rex, Alex, Arvin, Corz, Jim, Kiara, Malikh, Audrae, Franz, Hendrick, Janice, Jay, Jim, Jonathan, Mark, Marz, Mel, Pres, Nhonoy, Niel, Piper, Rheavil, Joey, Alma, Rodolfo, Ecker, Ryan. Hello also to a new addition to our RI Barkada, Roni, thanks for the great comments, to Miss Dieter of Lapaz, to Ian of Bacolod but who is in Iloilo right now, to Narle, Sunny and to Anuj of CMC, I love you all! Byers! Salamat gid sa mga walang-hintong text and reactions nyo! Catch Rational Insanity in TNT's online edition, check us out at www.thenewstoday.info, text me at (0920)9254269, or email me at prague@eudoramail.com .