Serendipity
Debunking the Male Myths
Let us suppose that I am not a jaded thirty-something, who although now married, had my fill of men who loved me and then hated me and then knowing it futile to hate me, went back to loving me; I would like to address some unfair untruths that have been perennially circulating about men way before I was even in my diapers.
I'm feeling generous, what with Father's Day a few days from now, so I'm giving men a gentle pat on the back and a way out from the typecasting that they have been dealing with since they too, were in their diapers. I will try to debunk and break the myths and the misconceptions; influence women to forgive, forget and look at their fathers, their husbands, their brothers and even their postman with new eyes -- like the true knights in shining armor that they really are (and not dog fodder in the case of the poor postman, especially if the mail is a month late). So here are a few men myths and my attempts to 'disprove' each one of them:
"All children, except one, grow up." -- Peter Pan. Just as Peter Pan never grew up, all men will always be babies -- this is perhaps one of the age-old myths tagged to our fathers, husbands and all men over the age of 17. No matter how macho, strong or huge a guy is size-wise, after a rough day in the office battling with his female bosses, he will still expect his wife or girlfriend to treat him like a six year-old boy who just had a nasty boo-boo on his knees after falling off a bike. Men expect us women to cushion each fall or failure with hugs and kisses (complete with cooing, comforting baby talk) and the inability to do so would mean that we will never be like their mothers. But of course, this is all speculation. Peter Pan is in fact a work of fiction, so how could we base this non-genetic disorder (which is the 'Peter Pan complex') from something that's utterly untrue, right? (My husband completely agrees but wants me to give him a hug first...).
Big boys don't cry. Way before the Field of Dreams and maybe the Godfather trilogy, men have learned to succumb to their emotions. Choking up while watching sappy movies does not make a man queer, rather it makes him dear especially to females prone to manipulation. In a study done on half a million adults in the U.S., men rated just as high in emotional awareness as women. Show me a man that has not shed one tear and I'll show you a robot or a cold, dead body in the morgue. Yes, big boys really do cry, especially when faced with tragic situations (i.e. when their wives max out their credit cards), but never, ever when they break up with women because that would be too unmanly (and we don't want a man who's too in touch with his feminine side, do we?).
Men are commitment-phobics. All I can say is, if this is indeed true, how come a huge percent of men are either married or engaged to be married? (Of course, it took eons for the fiancées and wives to drag their men to the altar, not to mention resorting to such underhanded techniques such as threatening to jump off a bridge, deliberately forgetting to pop the pill, saying "It's ok, I'm safe", right before the big bang and dabbling in a little voodoo like putting a double dose of 'love potion no. 9' bought from an ati vendor in his favorite drink when he's not looking.)
Who said men think about sex 39 times a day? This is a bit of an exaggeration, but if this were true, how could men run a nation, a fortune 500 company or even a small sari-sari store for that matter if they only think about sex, right? Sure, the regular jobless dudes in the street might have all the time in the world to think about it, but responsible men don't. Look at ex-Pres. Clinton, I mean give the guy a break. He wasn't thinking about sex when he was trying to think of ways and means to pay off the Reagan debt or when he was signing volumes of legal documents at his desk in the Oval office. In his almost 24-hour day as the most powerful man on earth, the only time he thought of sex was when this hot, young (albeit chubby) intern sashayed right in front of him. I mean, Monica should be given a medal for giving a hardworking President a hand (pun intended). And Clinton should in fact be congratulated for debunking the myth because hey, he only thought of sex not 39 times but only once.
And there are other myths like men will always be unfaithful, men never ask for directions and men love their cars more then their wives, but these are all what they really are: myths. I pity the woman who will believe these myths, for she will either die an old maid or worse, an unhappy virgin. (And if you take this article seriously, then you should get a life or better yet, a man.)