Cerebral Combustion
Oh, those cruel lips upon you been bestowed
There are people who are agreeable. There are people more likely to be disagreeable. And then there are those who talk about whose who. The only difference between the three is that in the absence of full proof constructive evidences the subject under discussion can fall victim in the midst of a malicious tittle-tattle. Objective criticisms can often prove hazardous because if conveyed to another, these blahs could be infected and the next tale has morphed into a full blown gossip. In the first place, gossips are those which are contaminated with malicious intent, albeit based upon truth or facts. These can easily be used as weapons to demean a certain individual and be thrown in the pit of judgment. There is a distinct disparity between an opinion founded on observation, of an opinion established in critique and personal evaluation, and of opinions based on spiteful commentaries and unnecessary annotations. When these are interpreted into a private tirade against a person, pointless and irrational, it becomes gossip.
Words are weapons readily at hand to get to our rivals, competitors or enemies, within our social group. More often than not, the awareness of the power of words reveals the capacity of someone who is able to destroy and damage another with a simple tale or idle chit chats. Gossip whores are evidently restless in their pursuits to make themselves appear better without giving much thought on the irreversible moral injury one can acquire while they are being tainted. At times, and this is where I am admittedly at fault, a person may feel liable to express opinions of disapproval against another and telling it to someone who you think deserves to know about it but while your intention can be good and genuinely downright to pure observation, it can be haphazardly compounded until that opinion reaches to the one involved which can result to an uncalled for vindictive controversy.
At other times, motives for tale bearing are not noble. The tale bearer may appear to convey deep concern for the victim of gossip while making suggestions when otherwise in truth; it is used only to send a message of dislike, meanness or abhorrence to the victim himself. The motives of the talebearers are wisely disguised so be aware of these dialogues because even if you did not cough up the words your name may perhaps be put in jeopardy and haplessly take all the blame even when your purpose is just and carefully weighed in.
One can quickly declare that if a derogatory statement is said about another is just when it is true. In a sense it is, but whether the statement is false or true, repeated information behind somebody's back is an absolute offense.
To get the message across isn't it not uncomplicated when formal discussion of conflicts is personally resolved and only within two people involved? Between friends, family members, or any social circles, incidental irrelevant subjects are unavoidable but one can always stray towards the common good in dearth of hurtful and tactless nattering and unprogressive chats. Some trivial truths aren't even good to pass around.
Essentially, talking is a way of life. But spreading words can seem to function differently in its pure elemental state. However, like a ship, it can be navigated towards a more serene path with a lesser potential to coalesce with rowdy waves of negative social, interpersonal, and psychological fragmentation. Carefully understanding the way we convey our messages can save relationship damages and collective public affiliations.
I resolve to speak ill of no man whatever, not even in a matter of truth; but rather by some means excuse the faults I hear charged upon others, and upon proper occasions speak all the good I know of everybody. --Benjamin Franklin
(Let me hear you. E-mail me at du_minatrix@yahoo.com)